Thank You Sonora Smart Dodd

Sonora Smart Dodd is more important than we realize.  Sonora was born in 1882 in Sebastian County Arkansas, to parents William Jackson Smart and Ellen Victoria Cheek Smart.  Sonora's father fought in the Civil War at the Battle of Pea Ridge.  After the Civil War ended, William Smart moved his growing family West to Spokane Washington.  Sonora's life was altered at 16 years old, when her mother died giving birth to her 6th child.  William Smart raised all six children by himself and Sonora held him in the highest regard due to his examples of strength and family.  In 1909, Sonora was so moved during a church sermon dedicated to the newly nominated celebration of Mother's Day and felt that there should be a celebration of fathers.  Sonora then pushed for a recognition of fathers on her father's birthday June 5th.  The day was then changed to the third Sunday in June and was officially celebrated as Father's Day on June 19th, 1910 in Spokane Washington.  Father's Day wasn't Nationally celebrated until 1916 and was recognized by President Lyndon Johnson with a presidential proclamation in 1966.  President Richard Nixon made Father's Day an officially recognized holiday in 1972, signing it into law

Father's Day is now observed on the third Sunday in June in 55 Countries and many more on other days.

Our modern observance of Father's Day consists of a "special day," for fathers where we get to do whatever we want right?  Our favorite dinner, total dominance of the remote control, maybe some golf, fishing...
I started to see Father's Day differently this year.  I think that I, as a father, owe the thanks to my wife and children.  On this Father's Day I want to recognize not only the people who define me as a father, but who more importantly make me feel so special that I am their father.  If I consider even for a moment what my life would be like without my wife and children, I am profoundly less of a person than I am with them.  I have every Father's Day card that I ever received and reviewing them yesterday I was moved to tears.  From the early cards written in my wife's handwriting, to the scribbled letters saying, "I love you daddy," they not only serve to mark my children's growth, but they also mark my own growth.
Now young adults, my children's Father's Day cards are more detailed and the messages show more retrospection of their father's life.

I remember my feelings on Father's Day cards to my father and remember my own emotions and perspective of him as a father.  The cycle repeats as all history seems to do and time demands comparison of my father and my children's perspective of their father.  Time and love helps us all to reflect more on the good and deny the bad, at least in our mind's eye and thank God for that.

I have already been asked what I would like for my "special dinner." What would I like to do on my, "special day."  I contemplate deeply for my answer and I realized that it is not my day at all.  It is a day that I will celebrate those special people who make it my, "special day."

Just as Sonora Smart Dodd passed from this earth in 1978, our father's also pass away however, on the third Sunday in June, we celebrate fathers, both of today and yesterday.  We remember father's that have died and yet the lessons of fatherhood remain with us forever.  We take the lessons, both good and bad, and we strive to become the best fathers possible.  This journey is not without challenge, not without setbacks and certainly not without disappointment.  It wasn't during times of success that my father taught me how to be successful, but through his fight for redemption.   It wasn't during times of bravery that I learned to be brave, but through his example of facing his fears.  It wasn't during times of great joy that I learned to be joyful, but through my father's times of despair.

We all have a concept of what makes a good father.  Maybe by example or maybe by observation, but we can all list the qualities that make a great father.  So, on Father's Day, should we strive to celebrate our own fatherhood?  Should we celebrate those who were our fathers?  I think, just as Sonora Smart Dodd originally thought one-hundred years ago, let's celebrate the honor of the man who sacrificed to be a father and celebrate those who make us fathers.  Let's live every day in remembrance of our father's successes and in awe that we are blessed to be added to that esteemed list of men called fathers.

On the third Sunday in June, 2010, I am so thankful that I am a father.  I am so thankful that on this day I can remember the incredible gift that I have been given every Father's Day...the name, "Father."  Special day?  I have never had anything but special days, ever since that first card, the first "I love you daddy," the first time I was called a father.

It is somewhat odd that Father's Day was originated by a woman, but then again, who greater to understand the magic of fatherhood?  Today I thank you Mrs. Smart-Dodd, for all of the fathers that you considered worthy of a special day called, Father's Day.

Enjoy this poem written about fathers
       by Sonora Smart Dodd

Musings of a Madonna 

I did not know the earth’s warm breast 

 Gave life to every tree, 

Or that the mountains wooed the sun 

 Until you came to me. 

I did not know that rains must fall 

 To set young seedlings free, 

Or that the snowflakes mantle them 

 Until you came to me. 

I did not know that rivers rush 

 To feed the hungry sea, 

Or that the heavens guard the tides 

 Until you came to me. 

I did not know that lullabies 

 Of God’s own symphony, 

Or that I am as one with Him 

 Until you came to me.

Whatever Happened to Victoria Lucas?

How many times do we wonder whatever happened to...?  Do we really care or just curious to see if we are ahead or behind the imaginary curve that defines us?  How many true friends do we accumulate in a life?  Is the number more or less than the number of books, shoes or stamps we collect.  How is a true friend defined.  A really tough question and like always when we need clarity, we turn to basics.


Merriam-Webster defines: 


True- "conformable to an essential reality."
Friend-  "a favored companion"


Huh? A conformable favored companion?  Maybe that's not too far from the...truth.  How about a favored companion that is accepts you for you?
Maybe through in a dash of unconditional love, if that concept is even possible outside of Biblical dimensions.  So, how is it that we really find very few true friends along this journey?  Maybe it's just too much work!  "Oh!  I can't be around her too much because she always brings up what's his name..."  "I know and he is so clueless to her games!"  "Well, she is my best friend after all"  WHAT!?!  This is a dialogue of a "best friend?"  Face it, we are all guilty of the same conversation.  It just feels better when we couch our conversations with, "I'm not one for gossip, but did you hear that...."


So why do we do it?  Or in the case of making deep friendships, why don't we do it?  Or maybe I'm the only one who doesn't and anyone reading this is just confused.  Because, in my opinion, like most things in life, it makes us feel better on some level.


Victoria Lucas was a young female writer and poet who in 1963 published an account of a young woman named Esther Greenwood, who moved from her Boston suburban home to the bright lights of New York City.  Esther unfortunately suffers from severe depression and becomes disillusioned by the life of a writer in NYC and has ongoing struggles with the question of, "is death better than life as I know it."  Esther ultimately has several suicide attempts, one, by swimming far out to sea, and another by taking 50 sleeping pills and lying under her house to die.  The authorities believe that Esther was kidnapped and after an exhaustive search, they find her unconscious under the house.  Finally, Esther plunges her head deep into her gas oven, seals all the doors and windows and successfully ends her life.


Why is Esther's life different from anyone else's?  And whatever happened to Victoria Lucas, the author of this novel?  Well, Esther's life is different because albeit parallel to many other's, it is ultimately fictional.  As to what became of Victoria Lucas, well, she also turned out to be fictional and her book was entitled, "The Bell Jar."  So, for those keeping score at home, Esther killed herself with gas, at the hands of Victoria Lucas, who was in reality a woman named Sylvia Plath.


Sylvia Plath was born October 27th, 1932 in Jamaica Plain, Massachusetts.  Sylvia was a gifted poet and writer, who like many very creative and talented people, she had problems dealing with problems.  Sylvia first tried to kill herself, after winning a prestigious opportunity to be a guest editor for Mademoiselle Magazine.  Her trip to NYC wasn't everything she thought it would be and despite this seemingly small dilemma, she ingested 50 sleeping pills and laid down under house...sound familiar?


Plath wasn't a small time writer who happened to be hung up on death.  Plath was a significant talent who's poetry was deeply depressing and often described death, blackness and loss.  The Bell Jar wasn't a small work of literature, it was a well received book from a well known author.  Plath was married to another well-known English poet named Ted Hughes and had two children.  Did no one read these poems or her books and maybe pull her aside at a picnic and say, "Ya know Sylvia...the old man and I  were just wondering the other night at dinner...are you feeling oh, I don't know...suicidal?"


Holy cow!  Really?  No one saw her poems like, Death & Co, Contusion, Edge, Lady Lazarus.  I guess they were just too busy.  The Bell Jar is how she described how her depression felt, like a bell jar being placed over her.  I know this was 1963 and the wheel had only been invented a few years earlier, but damn!


Maybe she hid it well, who knows, but just reading her poems makes me look for a house to lie under!  OK, so what's the point?


Sylvia Plath loved her kids, and her husband, who strangely enough had an affair with a woman named Assia Wevill.  Assia was a German born woman who escaped the Nazis and was also married...to her third husband, English poet David Wevill.  Forget soap opera's, this was a rocking time.  Speaking of poets, Assia was also a poet and is credited with translating Israeli poets work into English, under the name Assia Gutmann.  If you're not confused yet, you're just not trying hard enough.


OK, with all this confusion it's no wonder why no one knew how depressed Sylvia was...remember Sylvia, the one I was talking about?  Anyway, Sylvia published, The Bell Jar, in 1963.  The Bell Jar documented the depression of a young woman who was almost like Sylvia Plath, No, I take that back...JUST like the woman Sylvia Plath, and her unfortunate and untimely suicide.  That would consider that there is a fortunate or timely suicide, but I will let it stand.  Sylvia Plath sealed her doors and windows with towels, to prevent the gas from effecting her children, Frieda and Nicholas and thrust her head into a gas oven.  The last poem that young Plath wrote was called Edge.

Edge

The woman is perfected.
Her dead body wears the smile of accomplishment,
The illusion of a Greek necessity
Flows in the scrolls of her toga,
Her bare feet seem to be saying:
We have come so far, it is over.
Each dead child coiled, a white serpent,
One at each little
Pitcher of milk, now empty.
She has folded
Them back into her body as petals
Of a rose close when the garden
Stiffens and odors bleed
From the sweet, deep throats of the night flower.
The moon has nothing to be sad about,
Staring from her hood of bone.
She is used to this sort of thing.
Her blacks crackle and drag.


OK, that was nice...  The final chapter:  Sylvia's husband Ted the poet, slept with Assia the poet translating home wrecker, who strangely enough was pregnant with Ted's child when Sylvia killed herself, but terminated the pregnancy and had a 4 year-old daughter who Ted always thought was his, and Assia, who raised Sylvia's two children found out that Ted was also having an affair with two, yes two other woman, one 20 years younger than he, Assia also killed herself and her four year old child, by first giving them both a large dose of sleeping pills and yep, you guessed it, put her head in a gas oven.  Thank God we have less gas ovens around!  Sylvia's son Nicholas also suffered with severe depression and on March 23, 2009 he promptly hung himself.


I can almost understand in 1963, if everyone was so obsessed with themselves and seriously, who had time to write poetry with all the sex happening?  But do we really think we would notice now if someone went to extremes to say, "Hello...I'm trying to die here!"  I surely hope so.  Lindsey Lohan comes to mind.  Maybe no matter what we do, if people are self-destructive, I guess there is nothing short of kidnapping them that would intervene.  Certainly shows like, Celebrity Rehab have given National attention to some who are slowly doing what Sylvia Plath and other did quickly.


Humans have a powerful force called free will, but I would hope that if you or I knew Sylvia Plath, we would have tried to help her heal.  Maybe that concept is just plain short-sighted, but it would seem that people cared about her, her son, her husbands lover, enough to stop them, but maybe they didn't.  Either way we know for sure that suicide can be an act of the coward or the angry act of the scorned, but in the end it is an act of desperation.


The following poem is one that Plath wrote describing her thoughts about past suicide attempts, heartfelt and painful as they were.  If you are a true friend or have a true friend, congratulations...hold them dear.
PM

Lady Lazarus

I have done it again.
One year in every ten
I manage it-----
A sort of walking miracle, my skin
Bright as a Nazi lampshade,
My right foot

A paperweight,
My featureless, fine
Jew linen.

Peel off the napkin
O my enemy.
Do I terrify?-------

The nose, the eye pits, the full set of teeth?
The sour breath
Will vanish in a day.

Soon, soon the flesh
The grave cave ate will be
At home on me

And I a smiling woman.
I am only thirty.
And like the cat I have nine times to die.

This is Number Three.
What a trash
To annihilate each decade.

What a million filaments.
The Peanut-crunching crowd
Shoves in to see

Them unwrap me hand in foot ------
The big strip tease.
Gentleman , ladies

These are my hands
My knees.
I may be skin and bone,

Nevertheless, I am the same, identical woman.
The first time it happened I was ten.
It was an accident.

The second time I meant
To last it out and not come back at all.
I rocked shut

As a seashell.
They had to call and call
And pick the worms off me like sticky pearls.

Dying
Is an art, like everything else.
I do it exceptionally well.

I do it so it feels like hell.
I do it so it feels real.
I guess you could say I've a call.

It's easy enough to do it in a cell.
It's easy enough to do it and stay put.
It's the theatrical

Comeback in broad day
To the same place, the same face, the same brute
Amused shout:

'A miracle!'
That knocks me out.
There is a charge

For the eyeing my scars, there is a charge
For the hearing of my heart---
It really goes.

And there is a charge, a very large charge
For a word or a touch
Or a bit of blood

Or a piece of my hair on my clothes.
So, so, Herr Doktor.
So, Herr Enemy.

I am your opus,
I am your valuable,
The pure gold baby

That melts to a shriek.
I turn and burn.
Do not think I underestimate your great concern.

Ash, ash---
You poke and stir.
Flesh, bone, there is nothing there----

A cake of soap,
A wedding ring,
A gold filling.

Herr God, Herr Lucifer
Beware
Beware.

Out of the ash
I rise with my red hair
And I eat men like air.

To Err is Human, to Keep Erring is Insanity

As I sit down to write this, I reflect on the internal dialogue that plagues me after I write something like this...namely that it would have been more amusing to write about why Wilma Flintstone was secretly in love with Betty Rubble, but was afraid of the consternation of the prehistoric victorian values.  That being said, I start writing as usual, with an apology. I do however, think this subject is not only topical, but downright predictive.


In 1979, Afghanistan was on the brink of yet another civil war.  The cause, a faction of pro-communist Afghans and a faction of democratic Afghans.  The result...a killing here, a killing there and viola you have the Soviet Union getting involved as support.  Why did the Soviets get involved?  Well, since you asked, the United States brokered a "peace accord," between Israel and Egypt and began selling arms to Saudi Arabia and other Middle Eastern Countries, causing the Soviet Union to react in military strategic fear.  Long story semi-short, the Soviet-Afghan war begins, thousands die and the World continues to turn as many Countries condemn the action.  Fearing that the great satan Communism would gain a foothold in the oil rich Middle East, America via the CIA, sent shoulder mounted Stinger anti-aircraft missile systems as well as "para-military" trainers.  


President Jimmy Carter stated, "Soviet aggression could not be viewed as an isolated event of limited geographical importance but had to be contested as a potential threat to US influence in the Persian Gulf region."   The US was also worried about the USSR gaining access to the Indian Ocean by coming to an arrangement with Pakistan.  So fellow reader, we saw many more die, Soviet helicopters shot from the sky and U.S. trained Mujahideen rebels very appreciative for our help in fighting the "Superpower" Soviet Union and winning.  


The outcome of this was important.  The Soviet Union was viewed as weak and the Islamic insurgency was emboldened.  The U.S. Government then adopted National Security Decision Directive (NSDD) that continued to train Mujahideen forces in "unconventional warfare."  Translation, making car bombs, assassinations and cross-border attacks.  The end result (for those of us with ADD and those who are still reading, but waiting for the Wilma Flintstone analogy,) the rise of Osama Bin Laden.  America did a great job of accomplishing the goal of defeating Communist spread, but failed to rebuild Afghanistan to the level that the Afghan people would have appreciated and in the wake of that, we were viewed as an imperial user who cuts and runs when our needs were met.  When the Soviet Union retreated in embarrassing defeat, there was indeed a large scale civil war in Afghanistan and you guessed it...thousands were tortured, killed etc.  The Heroin however, was still in production and Afghanistan is still at war and the World is still spinning.  No more Democratic and no less feudal...time marches on.  Hmmm simplistic view I agree, but have we seen this movie before?


During his inaugural speech, President Kennedy pledged, "pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe, in order to assure the survival and success of liberty."    Though against U.S. troop deployment to South East Asia, Kennedy was also fresh off the fact that the Soviet's were ahead in the "Space Race", the Berlin wall was constructed, and the Bay of Pigs invasion was a disaster.  These events propelled Kennedy to, "draw a line in the sand."  Kennedy then said, "Now we have a problem making our power credible and Vietnam looks like the place,"  By 1963 there were 16,000 American military personnel in South Vietnam, up from 900 advisors sent by President Eisenhower.
The CIA assassinates a Vietnamese leader who was not towing the, "party line," Kennedy is furious that he didn't approve this action and Vietnam had a succession of corrupt leaders take and lose power with no real net effect on the battle.  Kennedy is assassinated, President Johnson takes over and is uninterested in the "actions in South East Asia."  President Nixon gets the nod and begins Vietnamization or as we know it today in Iraq, "let's train the Iraqis to defend themselves and plant the seeds of a fairly elected Democratic Government."  Again, does any of this sound familiar?


OK, next...the fall of Siagon, enter the Khmer Rouge on April 17th 1975 and then the resulting genocide that claimed over a million lives.


The most wise quote from General Maxwell Taylor, one of the principle architects of the war, "first, we didn't know ourselves. We thought that we were going into another Korean War, but this was a different country. Secondly, we didn't know our South Vietnamese allies... And we knew less about North Vietnam. Who was Ho Chi Minh? Nobody really knew. So, until we know the enemy and know our allies and know ourselves, we'd better keep out of this kind of dirty business. It's very dangerous."


Did we know our enemy in Iraq?  Did we know our allies?  Do we know ourselves?
Secretary of Defense Robert McNamara concluded that "the achievement of a military victory by U.S. forces in Vietnam was indeed a dangerous illusion."


Marine Corps General Victor H. Krulak was critical of General William Westmoreland's atrittion strategy, calling it "wasteful of American lives... with small likelihood of a successful outcome." As well, doubts surfaced about the ability of the military to train foreign forces.  The defeat also raised questions about the quality of the advice that was given to successive presidents by the Pentagon.


Starting to sound really familiar?  Harvard philosopher George Santayana said, "those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it."
Are we condemned to repeat the past?  Did we learn nothing from the words of leaders who in retrospect were critical of their own policies and despite their collective egos have warned us by their mistakes and analysis.  


March 2003, U.S. and allies invade Iraq.  The lessons of the past ring out.  President Kennedy's words, "Now we have a problem making our power credible and Vietnam looks like the place,"  Substitute Iraq for Vietnam and Bush for Kennedy.  The battle...costly, the outcome...unknown.  Our enemy...still unknown.
We are there now, it's true.  August 31st is coming up quickly as the "line in the sand," that President Obama has drawn as the date we remove the majority of U.S. military troops.  We will leave behind advisors to continue the training of the Iraqi defense forces.  The outcome...maybe a huge victory in public opinion and a free Iraq.  But what if...What if civil war erupts, we are pulled into a battle that must be fought, lest we seem weak and the militant Islamic rule becomes emblazoned once again by yet another Super Power failure.  What if we face the decision to support the troops we have there and in doing so we ultimately deepen the military involvement and start from scratch?  


The final words after the defeat of the Soviet Union in Afghanistan were said by a new Islamic warrior of the day, Osama Bin Laden, "credit for the collapse of the Soviet Union ... goes to God and the mujahideen in Afghanistan ... the US had no mentionable role," but "collapse made the US more haughty and arrogant."


The words of President Johnson induce both feelings of fear and regret that we have not learned and we seem intent and potentially condemned to repeat history.

"I wish it were possible to convince others with words of what we now find it necessary to say with guns and planes: armed hostility is futile -- our resources are equal to any challenge -- because we fight for values and we fight for principle rather than territory or colonies, our patience and our determination are unending.  Once this is clear, then it should also be clear that the only path for reasonable men is the path of peaceful settlement."

PM

Touched by Greatness

On March 30th 1968 a bright red colt was born to parents chosen by the toss of a coin.  The colt was born to "Somethingroyal," and stallion, "Bold Ruler." 
Bold Ruler was considered one of the most significant stallions of his time.  He was known to have both the speed to be a frontrunner and the stamina to run 1 1/4 mile tracks.


The colt, a red chestnut horse with three white socks and a star with a narrow blaze, was named Secretariat, a name that sets the standard for horse racing to this day.  Secretariat showed exceptional greatness within the first two years of life, winning the 1972 American Horse of the Year honors.  This record for a two year old was only repeated once since, in 1977.

July 4th, 1936, another great champion first fell in love with horses after he sat atop a horse in Powell, Ohio.  The man's name was James Gaffney.  That Summer day would begin a life-long  love affair with horses and horse racing.  A smile from a young child's face would hint of a future passion and an easy smile that is crystalized in all who knew Jim.


April 1972, Jimmy Gaffney's life intersected with the famed racehorse Secretariat.  Jim had worked with racehorses for most of his life and when he first met Secretariat, his life was forever changed.  Jim was quoted as saying:

"I had been on race horses almost all of my adult life and when I stepped up on Secretariat the first time in April, 1972. I had this big red machine under me and from that very first day I knew he had had a power of strength that I have never felt from a two year old horse before. The very first time Lucien Laurin told me to work him a quarter mile the April morning at Belmont Park, I told him that he would be RUNNING REALLY FAST and he said so let him. I went a quarter in 21 seconds and I believe that Lucien realized at that time we had a racehorse on our hands."


Jim was one of two men entrusted with exercising the champion Secretariat and did his job with the same passion that defined his life.  A coin toss decided the birth of this champion and fate introduced the champion to a man who would contribute equal greatness to Secretariat and to those who loved him.  


1973 Secretariat wins the famed Kentucky Derby by 2 1/2 lengths, setting a track record of 1 minute 59 seconds, a record that stood for the next 28 years.  Each 1/4 mile segment of the race was successively faster than the last, demonstrating that Secretariat was accelerating even through the last 1/4 mile.  The win was epic.


1973 Secretariat runs the Preakness Stakes and again, comes from behind and is never challenged, winning by 2 1/2 lengths.  The champion racer was now on the cover of Time magazine and center stage in the public consciousness that was being challenged at the time, by events such as U.S. troops being withdrawn from Vietnam, oil prices increasing by 200%, 100,000 unemployed workers laid off from U.S. car makers, Roe v. Wade trial and deepening  recession...but for that moment in time America had hope.  The hope was that this young horse could win the Triple Crown after an upcoming race at the Belmont Stakes.


1973 Belmont Stakes, Secretariat runs in front of 67, 605 eager spectators and opens not from behind the pack, but setting a fast pace, challenged only by a horse named Sham.  
Secretariat and Sham run 10 lengths ahead of any other horse.  After 6 furlongs, Sham begins to tire and fades into the pack, finishing last.  Secretariat however, runs even faster, finishing 31 lengths ahead of the other horses and not only wins the race, but sets a record for the fastest time of any horse in a 1 1/2 mile track, 2 minutes and 24 seconds.  The record time continues to stand today.


Many winning ticket holders never turn in their tickets, choosing instead to hold on to them as souvenirs and a memory of that magical day at Belmont Racetrack, when Secretariat, won the coveted Triple Crown, reassuring us that even in challenging times events can occur that show us greatness.


On October 4th, 1989, Secretariat lost his earthly race that all living things run, but he left us with a legacy that is just as important today.  His name will be forever linked to a championship year when he drew our attention away from World events, even for a few minutes.  Secretariat's championship year inspired us, gave us reason to look at our own lives with promise and hope, and made us smile.


On the morning of June 3rd, 2010, Jim Gaffney also left us with a legacy that will stand for all time.  Jim Gaffney had many accomplishments, loving Husband, dedicated Father and Grandfather, friend to everyone he's ever met.  I am proud to say that I  had the good fortune of getting to know Jim over the last seven years.  His passion and happiness was always evident in his quick smile and warm easy laugh. 


On the weekend of May 29th 2010 Jim Gaffney attended an event at the Belmont racetrack with his son Jim.  Even through his weakened state, he visited, took pictures and signed autographs for other horse racing fans...with his signature warm smile.  Jim was able to meet one of Secretariat's offspring and for a moment he was joined with the history that made him so passionate during his life.  Jim worked with Secretariat for a little over a year, but it was the year that the name and courage of Secretariat captured our hearts.  Jim's life was one of the rare occasions when someone touches their passion and are forever changed, and through their experience, forever change us.  He lived a rich and full life and this full life inspires us to hope for a brush with greatness, that even by chance can change us forever.


Secretariat is remembered as a horse that loved to run, a horse that not only came from behind, but that ran faster and harder than any other horse, a horse that was clearly motivated by the joy of running the race.


June 5th, 2010:  The 142nd running of the Belmont Stakes will start just a few hours after funeral services for Mr. Jim Gaffney have concluded.  The race he loved, the track at which he celebrated the win of Secretariat, the history that he added to equally as much as it added to him.  Today Jim will not be physically at his beloved track, but I can't imagine that his spirit will be far away.  History offers us awards to mark the passage of time, records to signify our achievements, but Jim was beyond that.  Jim will be remembered as much as history itself.  Jim's life will stand to remind us that one year in a life lived for something great can define every year that follows.  Our time is finite, but our legacy can live forever.  Jim's love of life is an example to us all, touching greatness, however brief or protracted, will spawn hope, happiness and contentment...what more is there?  


So today as the announcer at Belmont says those famous words, "and there off,"  we know you are there Jim, yesterday, today and forever.


The following short quote from Jim, says more about the man than volumes of words could ever say and pays tribute to the man who ran with greatness, Jim Gaffney.

"I was just one of the spokes of the wheel that had helped Secretariat on his path to greatness and immortality. Any good trainer, exercise rider, groom, or jockey could have done what we did. It was SECRETARIAT that did it, we just pointed his head and he would do it from there... It was a beautiful ride....

I feel honored and proud to have been a small part of his life and miss him dearly. I guess animals have a way of growing on you and he certainly did with me and will always have a place in my heart.


Sincerely, Jim Gaffney"


A wonderful ride indeed Jim, and all of those who adored you in life will miss you dearly, but your legacy...Will be forever nurtured and celebrated.




PM

Fiddling While Rome Burns

06/01/2010

Headlines:

Palestinian aid ship crossing the blockade line in the Gaza is boarded by Israeli Defense Forces.


BP oil spill continues in the 43rd day with no end in sight, BP President says, "Believe me, no one wants this (oil spill) over more than me...I want my life back."


Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu cancels visit to White House...has called White House Chief of Staff a, "self-hating jew."


The White House may have offered Joe Sestak a job if he didn't run for Senate.

Is there an image today that galvanizes public sentiment and offers hope?  I'm not sure if times have changed and we as a society have, "information burnout," or what.  Maybe there are so many images blown across our retinas that we just don't look...maybe we don't even care?  Consider the past first.  President Reagan having a beer in a pub with several unemployed workers during the deep recession of the early 80's.  Reagan's public support grew from this image.  In retrospect, the Reagan plan to end the recession cut enormous social programs, left many poor elderly citizens homeless and our budget deficit was only $80 million.  The picture told people more that political rhetoric, or was it simply all we needed?  The images of President Clinton appearing confident despite many critical events both foreign and domestic.  War in the Balkans, genocide, Mogadishu uprisings, sexual misconduct and eventual impeachment...Clinton left office with an approval rating of 66%!  The highest rating since World War II!!!  President George Bush standing at "ground zero," after September 11th, surrounded by the heroes that worked to save others...gave us hope despite the reality of retrospective viewing.

Today, it would seem that we have no images of commitment, or at least I don't see them.  Perhaps we want a small dose of panic in our leaders to demonstrate to us that they are sharing our fears and truly engaged.  Maybe panic is a poor choice of words, maybe we just need a glimpse of, "It effects me too."  or "I hear you and the people who dropped these buildings will soon hear us all."

The recent oil spill has made some say, "The White House is not engaging..."  "No one seems to understand the crisis that we are experiencing down here."  "This is Obama's Katrina..."

What if being analytical, as President Obama has been defined as, just isn't giving people what they, "need."  It seems that we are absent of hope as a society in the areas of fiscal relief, war progression, nuclear proliferation in Iran, perceived "under the table deals" in our Government.  Maybe we need more today from our leaders than the "us" of the past drew comfort from.  Consider that President Obama gained enormous support during his candidacy by doing just that..."Yes we can."  The Presidential Candidate Obama seemed very animated during his presidential run and we ate it up.  The disconnect is that if promises have no follow through then it returns to hurt your image profoundly, but if the promises are continually followed by updates on why they did or did not occur, "yet" then we seem to say a collective, "OK!" and we gladly switch the channel to Real Housewives of Akron.

In my opinion, I would be happier if there was simply a positive message that, "we are on it."  Israel...we got this, we are BFF's and we have your back of course.  Iran, hell yes!  We are watching it and if they do develop nuclear weapons...we'll have their asses!  Oil spill...it is a real mess and I understand that the folks are out of work because of corporate lack of insight, but guess what...BP will start paying to help those people today and every day that this continues they will pay MORE!  BP will be held responsible for all costs and we will hold their feet to the FIRE starting today...without LIMITS.
Recession...Look, it sucks and if I were you I'd be depressed and PISSED!  We are going to raise taxes on those that have not been effected, we will support small businesses and we will STOP foreclosures AND not allow those who simply don't want to pay on their house and can afford to, to walk away...and it starts TODAY!

I may be naive and completely ignorant of the "workings of politics," but I know I am not alone.  Most of us simply bah on our way to work, or in 10 million cases, on our way to the unemployment office.  Our "leaders" are not viewed as leaders.  It's kind of like when the clerk at Blockbuster gives a cursory look at the returned movies behind her and says, "nope, sorry we're out of that movie," despite the stack of the movie you want behind them.  Doesn't it feel like people care more when they just...oh, I don't know...seem to try?   That's all we want, simply try or even act like you do!

President Clinton flew over Central Florida in the 90's after an F4 Tornado leveled a swath from horizon to horizon.  The image  published of the President was him staring longingly out of Marine one helicopter.  He had such empathy in his eyes.  Andy Card, the White House Chief of Staff later wrote that the President was playing cards and smoking a cigar, as if on cue he stopped the card game, put the cigar down and bit his lower lip as only Clinton could and looked down at the carnage with a million dollar frown...then the cards came back, the cigar came back and we were none the wiser.  Isn't that a false sense of concern?  You betcha!  But, how else can a human being care about everything that matters?  I can't even care about missing garbage day when we are missing the mortgage payment!  So it's fake...we need it.  We want it and we miss it.

Don't roll up your sleeves to feign, "I'm ready to work."  Just ask your image advisors and I know you got'em...and act your ass off.  How superficial...indeed it is, but we'll buy it all day long!

So today leaders...all leaders...don't take meetings, don't take polls...TAKE ACTING LESSONS!  I hate that I am saying that, but how great does it feel when our friends and family tell us, "Everything is gonna be fine!"

And if that doesn't work for you, then you can always pay attention to this late breaking news:

"Heidi Montag is ready to split from Spencer Pratt"...hmmm it truly is the end of the World!

PM

Ground Control to Major Tom

Stress is so common to most of us that we rarely see the triggers or the patterns that are left in the wake. How does stress have anything to do with the picture of three astronauts?

Mission: : a pre-established and often self-imposed objective or purpose.

Plan: an orderly arrangement of parts of an overall design or objective.

How many times do we find ourselves so stressed and wonder why we are so stressed. I think that stress is a mismatch of sorts, between what our plan was and what actually occurs. We may go to work and have a preconceived idea that the day will be within the limits of what we would consider a good day. We then get a phone call from hell, our co-workers problems become our problems, the boss is in a bad mood and takes it out on you, or just doesn't treat us with the respect that we thought our day pre-destined. You can almost feel the stress from these descriptions alone. Job loss, health problems, financial problems...etc. So what happens during this preconceived outcome and the actual outcome? Your central nervous system reacted and automatically. Our bodies are an incredibly complex system focused on self-preservation. How could we not plan for a problem free day? It is pure fantasy to believe that our lives will be without trials and surprises. When we encounter a surprise, whether a large dog barking and bearing down on you, a sudden financial crisis, a relationship difficulty or a job loss, we have this release of epinephrine, norepinephrine and other potent chemicals. We know this response as, "fight or flight." and if you have experienced this, you know well the feelings both during and after the release of adrenaline. During the crisis, we have unbelievable strength and focus...unfortunately, after the adrenaline is depleted, we feel washed out, shaking, nauseous or faint. The response to crisis is brief, but long enough to either confront the danger or to flee from it. But what about a prolonged level of unexpected crisis or even potential crisis? What about the chronic low level stresses that we face all the time? We still have the same response, but to a lesser extend and the recovery is quicker as well. The long-term effects of chronic low level stress is fatigue, poor focus, depression and anxiety. We may not anticipate a wild dog attack every day, but we do get accustomed to these low level stresses to the point that they become accustomed and even expected. This is where we just feel defeated. Why are we surprised when life and the people within our lives are unfair or exhibit randomly confusing acts? Because we have expectations. The expectations that life is fair, people are fair and bad things won't happen, is a very optimistic premise, but unfortunately a naive one.

The example of the Apollo 11 flight is a good example of planning and being mission oriented. The astronauts, like soldiers, pilots etc. plan for events to go horribly wrong and because of this planning, they are not surprised or especially stressed when that time comes...and statistically it will come.

The following is a small part of the transcript conversations between Mission Control and Neil Armstrong Commander of the Lunar Lander (Eagle) Upon reading their words, you may feel like this was just a, "day at the office." The reality is that it was almost the tragic loss of two American heros.

Early space flight utilized the best in computer systems available in 1969. No where near the technology that most of us have today in our cell phones. Neil Armstrong, Commander of the mission and "Buzz" Aldrin, were assigned a task that was never performed before and one that in the 60's "space race," with the Soviet Union, was being watched by everyone in the civilized world! As the Lunar Module was approaching the Moon, the computer systems began to be overloaded with incoming data and crashed! Yes, the computers began to alert with codes of failing systems. Aldrin monitored fuel remaining and Armstrong steered the landing craft toward an alien landscape that was plotted, but ultimately Armstrong had to decide where to land the drifting craft and fast! Upon landing, the landing module had only 15 seconds of fuel remaining. This was later found to be an instrument error secondary to the computer crash, but as they approached it must have taken reflexive movement and calmness to maintain composure and to defeat the internal self-preservation response that most of us would have experienced. The following transcript was the actual text of that landing:

CDR Forward drift?

' (EAGLE)

LMP Yes.

· _ (EAGLE )

LMP Okay.

(EAGLE )

CONTACT LIGHT.

LMP ACA - out of DETENT.

: ( EAGLE)

CDR Out of DETENT.

LMP MODE CONTROL both AUTO. i_E_CENT · '_'-COMMAND

OVERRIDE - OFF. ENGINE ARM - OFF.

LMP 413 is in.

CC We copy you down, Eagle.

CDR Houston, Tranquility Base here.

CDR THE EAGLE HAS LANDED.

CC Roger, Tranquility. We copy you on the ground.

You got a bunch of guys about to turn blue.

We're breathing again. Thanks a lot.

CDR Thank you.

(TRANQ)

CC You' re looking good here.

CDR Okay. We're going to be busy for a minute.

I would have been busy too! Changing my flight suit! It's interesting that the team on the ground was having a greater physiological response than the astronauts. After making a seat of the pants landing, a landing by the way that if to short of an approach or too long of an approach or simple a landing in the wrong place...would have meant sudden DEATH! That is extreme focus and planning, most importantly execution of the mission.

OK, the Lunar Module is on the Moon, Armstrong begins to prepare to be the first man to ever conduct a space walk. Can you imagine that? No one knew what would happen! Would he touch the surface and die? Would he take a few steps on the Moon and get killed by a large lunatic (sorry) he didn't know, we didn't know. The two Astronauts actually had Communion that was prepared on Earth by Aldrin's Priest. They couldn't talk openly about it then because there had recently been an atheist pushing for a ban on religious views in governmental programs, but the two space walkers thought enough about the potential dangers they were about to face, to consider absolution. There was a mission and a plan and each step was met without fear or even obvious anxiety regarding the next step. The Astronauts knew that in testing, the vehicle they were in failed 50% of the time, when attempting to separate and return them to orbit to dock with their circling ride home. They knew right then and there that even after landing, walking on the moon, collecting space rocks, planting the American flag...they had a 50-50 chance of dying a slow death right there on the moon! Can you imagine conducting your day to day missions if you knew that half the time you were at risk of not making it home? The Astronauts were not only brave, but so mission focused that they seemingly did not think of the past or future, only the present. It's not that they weren't concerned with potential outcomes, they just couldn't control them and knew that they had prepared as much as possible and had no control of the other factors.

This isn't to suggest that we think of the worst and prepare for it to happen, just that we anticipate that events may happen and try to accept that we are doing everything possible to prepare and after that we can do no more.

OK, moon walk complete...check. Time to go back into orbit...oops! "Uh...hey Neil...I guess in all the excitement I must have bumped the switch and it broke off." Buzz may have said. "That's OK Buzz...which switch is that?" Neil may have asked calmly. "Oh, just the one that lights the jets that get us off the Moon." Buzz answers. "Oh, that's OK buddy...I kinda like it here anyway and who needs Oxygen when you have a view like this." Neil certainly didn't say. Aldrin broke the switch that would jettison the module back into orbit to dock with the capsule that would take them home! That event would most certainly top anything that happens to us on a regular basis! "Well...that's a problem for sure...let's come up with a solution." They may have said. Buzz Aldrin came up with the solution and inserted his felt tipped pen into the broken opening to hold down the switch that allowed Armstrong to light the engines...you remember, the engines that worked 50% of the time! The jets did work and the module was off to dock with the orbiting capsule and return home.

OK, my point is that they planned and practiced for months to counter any emergency small or large. The rest was out of their control. We are caught off guard so many times by events that we don't consider possible and that mismatch of what we thought would happen and what actually happened can cause us to fall into a sudden stress state. We cannot live in fear, as that is also a stress inducing stimulus and doesn't help us execute our mission. We can however, recognize that events can change and plan for these contingencies. It sounds easy to say, "Oh well I can't change it so I might as well just relax..." But what if we did plan for the fact that there is an unfairness to our environment and learn to accept that we are mortal and as mortal beings we will have flaws, as will others. We will lose jobs, we will someday have health problems, we will experience great sadness. What if we accept that and temper our frailness with one simple fact, for today I am happy! Right in this minute I am living my plan and working diligently on my mission. What about the peace that comes with acceptance that not everyday will be good, in fact some will be tragic...but right now, I can look out this little window in my space craft and watch a beautiful sunrise over the distant horizon. We can certainly intellectualize the possible outcomes, we can plan for contingencies, but after that...we can just enjoy the now.

We will most likely never know the focus and training of an Astronaut, but we do know our ourselves better than anyone else. We may never walk on the Moon, but we can dream of touching the sky. We may never face the perils of space flight, but we will face the same ultimate ending as every other person on Earth. In this minute we are here. Our plan is set and our overall mission is in front of us. No mission you say? Ok, sit down and make one...right now. Start with a plan and link it to another plan and then, you are on your way to the Moon! Prepare, consider, prepare more, consider more and prepare. Know there will be the little and big "switches" that will get broken in our lives...but prepare to fix them and move on. These events are sure to happen, that you can count on. Remember the coolness that our Astronauts exemplified and just try to have a small fraction of that calmness. It would have been wasted energy for them to call Dr. Phil and scream, "We don't want to die here on this stupid Moon!" We can control only so much of our future and we can control none of our past. So if you have reached the surface of the Moon in your life and took yourself a little stroll, picked up a few things, planted your flag, then let's light the jets and get on home...there's a big parade awaiting you! Then you too can say, "Tranquility base here."

PM

Should have, Would have, Could have...

Decision, decisions. This blog should be a bit lighter, but probably the most important thought I have and the most commonly used approach when I consider past decisions as successes or failures. When I start to regret past decisions, I commonly say to myself, "two roads diverged."

The working premise:

March 20th 2003, America and the "coalition of the willing," invaded Iraq. This action followed the attack of our Country on September 11th 2001 by foreign terrorists. Intelligence agencies reported that Iraq was in possession of weapons of mass destruction (WMD's) and had intentions of using them. I am writing this as it would have been written at the time of this event, without present day thoughts or evidence. I am trying to discuss these events in terms of the perceived sentiment of the time, since that is all we have available when we make decisions. For the sake of this blog, I will refer to the outcomes of this event as Event (1) and Event (2) to demonstrate my point.

Event (1)

Iraq is invaded, Saddam Hussein is arrested and hanged, we are still embroiled in a dangerous urban guerilla war after seven years and Iraq creeps toward a semi-stable government.

Event (2)

Iraq is not invaded due to lack of evidence of WMD's and Saddam's regime continues under ongoing suspicions of ill will and potential further destabilization of the Middle East region.

"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,"

"And sorry I could not travel both,"

"And be one traveler, long I stood,"

"And looked down one as far as I could,"

"To where it bent in the undergrowth;"

When we reflect on a past decision, the Iraq invasion as exampled, we can stand here in our present day with our present knowledge and try to make a judgement on a time that has past. This is not to imply that we cannot learn from our past, but our life lesson in respect to the past is just that, a reflection of the choice we made, good or bad, and the mentally created outcome that could have been. Outcomes that are limited only by our imaginations.

Two roads diverged in a Yellow Wood," our decision point is wisely highlighted by Robert Frost, author of the 1920 work, "The Road not Taken." We face a decision just as the observer faces two paths, or maybe more than two decision paths. We can wish that we could take both paths or decisions, but we of course cannot. "And sorry I could not travel both and be one traveler long I stood and looked down one as far as I could to where it bent in the undergrowth." We can stare at our choices and strain to envision their outcomes, but of course we can never see to the end of the path until we have made a decision and travelled it. Our ultimate outcome is surely hidden as we search the length of the decision, every possible outcome, "to where it bent in the overgrowth." Consider event 1, no one could see the outcome that we now reflect upon, with the knowledge of the present day, the, "yellow wood," the Autumn of our lives.

"Then took the other, as just as fair and having perhaps the better claim, because it was grassy and wanted wear; though as for that the passing there had worn them really about the same."

As we stood on the pivotal decision point and searched for outcome possibilities, we see the two decisions, maybe one better than the other from that point in time, perhaps a "better claim because it was grassy and wanted wear." Event 2 may have looked better in some respects to the observer, but as Frost states well, "as for that the passing there had worn them really about the same." No matter how long we deliberate about a decision, the view of both paths ultimately appear about the same. We at times may say that event 2 is a better path than the path laid in front of event 1, or visa versa. We can never know from that pivotal perspective.

"And both that morning equally lay, in leaves no step had trodden black." "Oh I kept the first for another day!" "Yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back."

At the junction when the decision was made to invade Iraq, limitless outcomes were no doubt discussed by very intelligent and experienced professionals, who know more about the truth than we will unfortunately ever realize. I would imagine that, "both that morning equally lay, in leaves no steps had trodden black." There were certainly no absolutes that would have blackened the choices that laid in front of the decision makers. "Oh I kept the first for another day," but knowing how way leads on to way I doubted if I should ever come back." Again, at that pivotal point decision makers may have considered that one day the decision not taken could be revisited, but in reality we can never go back to the point at which we made the decision...no matter how obvious the outcome is to us when viewed with future eyes.

"I shall be telling this with a sigh, somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood and I- I took the one less travelled by, and that made all the difference."

We are here in 2010, 7 years after we have witness the human and financial cost of event 1, and we are individually defining the meaning of the word, "sigh." If you have lost a loved one while they fought in the Iraq war, you may define the word sigh as a sorrowful sigh. If you are an Iraqi citizen who feel the hope of a new life, you may define the sigh as a sigh of great hope and relief. If you were George W. Bush, you may define the sigh as regret or guarded optimism...we can never know, but one thing we can agree on is that the word sigh and its meaning is individual and the crux of this whole poem. Four time Pulitzer Prize winning poet, Robert Frost was no stranger to great sorrow and celebrity and in his own words said of this poem, "That poem is tricky, very very tricky." I think he was absolutely right. Many have recited this poem and defined the meaning as being a statement of non-conformity. They see it as, "a road less traveled." They take from that to be that the traveler had taken the road that others found has not, an more non-traditional road. The problem with that of course is that the name of the poem is, "The Road Not Taken." This would to me, state that Frost was not suggesting the poem as an ode to nonconformity.

Two roads did diverge in the decision to invade Iraq and to a less important approach, to every decision that we consider and make. "Two roads diverged in a wood and I- I took the one less traveled by." The road or decision that we didn't take is certainly the road, "less traveled by," because it was not the road we took, not the decision we made. As we reflect on the past decision, with the present knowledge of the outcome and our imagination to fill in the blank slate of what would have, could have or should have been, we may say, "and that made all the difference." The difference, good or bad, success or failure, complicated or simple...it did make all the difference, to us.

It is incredibly difficult to reflect from our personal "yellow wood," the Autumn of our lives, no matter what age we are when we reflect upon the outcome, and not feel that we made the, "right decision." The decision made and the outcome that we lived, good or bad, is more realistic to us, since we did experience it. The other decision, "that morning equally lay," cannot be saved for another day. The past has expired and the ability to change it has past as well. We can however, reflect on it as honestly as possible, but ultimately this exercise ends with a sigh. A sigh for us to define and, "that...made all the difference."

I thank Robert Frost for the insight he has imparted. It has helped me many times to reflect on countless decision and makes sense to me and hopefully to others...if you made it this far down the "Road Not Taken."

PM